15 Reasons to Show Grace

A couple of days ago I posted a link to Rachel Held Evans’ “15 Reasons I Left Church” on my Facebook wall, along with this comment:

While we may not agree with all of Rachel Held Evans’ reasons, or her conclusion, those of us who are church leaders should be aware that Rachel is not alone - there are undoubtedly people sitting in our pews thinking the same things.

To lay my cards on the table: I resonate with 7 or 8 of the 15 reasons that Rachel lists at my current church, and have been there with another couple of them at previous churches. On a few of the items I disagree with her doctrinally, and the frustrations I’ve had over some of these issues haven’t driven me to leave my church… but that may be because I’ve chosen to simply be quiet about some of the topics rather than being vocal and stirring the pot. So I was curious to see what sort of responses I’d get on FB, and I wasn’t disappointed.

The responses ran the gamut that I sort of expected; a couple friends identified with it quite strongly; a couple more felt the pain and frustration in her post but materially disagreed with most of the content or with how she said it; one graciously said that she “didn’t get it at all”, but that it was unhelpful whining. A college acquaintance reposted the link and got several responses from other college folks universally accusing Evans of whining and “making it all about her rather than about God”.

I’m not surprised by these reactions any more, but I am significantly saddened. Questioning is not sin, and wrestling with theological issues is a sign of healthy, involved, real faith, not a pointer toward apostasy. As Chaplain Mike over at InternetMonk.com so eloquently ranted a couple of weeks ago:

It is Islam that sets forth submission and unquestioning acceptance as the ultimate in piety — not Christianity nor our parent faith as expressed in the Hebrew Bible. The faith we follow is one of lively dialogue between the Creator and his creatures. We question, complain, express our anger, cry out in pain, and bargain with God. Sometimes, if you believe the Bible, God even changes his mind at our behest. Like Jacob, we refuse to let him go until he blesses us. Like Moses, we argue with God. Like the psalmists, we groan and hurl curses toward the heavens. On the other hand, preachers like [name redacted - that’s not the point] want us to get in line and behave. They rebuke our messiness, our humanness. They use the sovereignty of God to shut us up.

Maybe you wrestle with doubt and questions on a daily basis. Or maybe you’ve gone to the same church your whole life and never had the slightest inclination to doubt or argue with what is taught. Maybe you’re somewhere in between. No matter where you are on that spectrum, though, the first response has to be grace.

Grace allows us to disagree with a brother or sister but embrace them anyway. There is a time for teaching and correction, but for the hurting brother or sister, that time comes after love has been lavished and healing has begun.

Jesus didn’t rebuke the doubters; he encouraged them. Even Thomas, who after three years of following Jesus around really had more faith - even Thomas Jesus graciously called close and encouraged him to believe. The rebukes were reserved for those who thought they had it all together and were judging those who they thought didn’t. Judging by the reaction I’ve seen over the past few days, it’s time to go back and learn that lesson again.

My brain is full: a quick clarification

I realize after writing these last couple of posts that they may make me sound like I’m deeply unhappy or unsatisfied with my current church. Given that lots of my local church friends read my blog, let me assure you that it’s not the case. I’m happy with where we are as a church. I’m encouraged and challenged by the teaching on a regular basis. I enjoy serving as a part of our music team. I’ve made some good friends in the three years we’ve been at Stonebridge, and I know those relationships will only deepen as time goes on.

We’re also involved in a community group (which is a new addition for us this year). It’s possible that as we get to know our group better it will serve as some of the fellowship I’m looking for. But those relationships take time to grow. We’ll see how it goes. And I’m also enthusiastic about the spiritual goals that our church leadership has set out for us this year. They’re good ones. We just have to follow through on them and make them more than just words.

I wouldn’t be surprised at all if I get an email from my pastor sometime within the next week saying “hey man, read your blog, anything we can talk about? How can we minister to you better?” I love my pastor deeply and greatly appreciate the fact that he will notice it and be faithful as a shepherd to get with me and see what’s up.

But here’s the thing. I don’t think that what I’m looking for is someone or some group to minister to me in a way that I’ve been missing. What I’m looking for is a community of believers who can join, side by side, in agreement that we are all broken and in need of the Gospel to minister to us on a daily basis.

[My apologies: 300+ words is hardly a quick clarification. sigh]

Hard, true words from @tallskinnykiwi

Andrew Jones (aka “Tall Skinny Kiwi”), “itinerant social entrepreneur”, wandering missionary and prolific blogger, has a hard but true, and dare I say, prophetic post on his blog today. It’s unfortunate that the piece is headlined as an appeal to be chosen to speak on The Nines, because the bulk of the post is about the changes coming for the church and for Christian culture.

Did I mention it was a hard word? Here are just a few of his headline points:

  • Church as we have known it is not the first option for the next generation. Neither is it an affordable option. It is not sustainable in the long term.
  • Seminaries are in trouble.
  • The Christian music industry as we have supported it, is over.
  • The Christian publishing industry, as we have enjoyed it over our lifetime, is over.
  • The church planting movement, in its ecclesiocentic and unholistic form, has played out its song and is now doing an unrequested encore.
  • Prayer meetings are focused on making our outdated methods work better.

“If Americans want to play in the sandbox in global missions and sustainable holistic church ministry”, says Jones, “then they need to listen to what the majority world is already discovering and implementing.” He says that we can and should use this time of recession to re-orient and re-calibrate our thoughts on ministry and mission rather than just asking for more money.

You should go read the piece to hear his whole argument. Hard as it may be, I think Jones is right.

More about church efficiency and effectiveness

I’ve been mulling over Skye Jethani’s question about efficiency and effectiveness after my brother Andrew prodded me with some comments. Andrew argues for prioritizing efficiency and effectiveness thusly:

If reaching people with the Gospel is the ultimate goal, then efficiency (the stewardship of resources towards the greatest gospel advance possible) and effectiveness (the fruit of that stewardship) is essential. We’re asking, ‘what do we have that is being used for missions, and how well is it doing its job?’ If you’re not constantly asking those two questions than you’re not really going to be ‘effective’..

I’m beginning to think that we actually more or less agree on the need for efficiency and effectiveness, but are looking at it in different perspectives. Because the goal is two-fold: “preach the Gospel”, and “make disciples”.

Now, maybe we can preach the Gospel most effectively by just taping the “best of” sermon series from and distributing it via video to every corner of creation. But does that help us with disciple-making?

Or does it possibly stunt our disciple-making efforts because it takes away opportunities for men to become teachers and hone their teaching skills, and for local pastors to tailor teaching to speak specifically to the needs of their local congregation?

We’re getting a ways off here from Jethani’s original point, maybe. And yeah, I’m sure any well-run megachurch is going to need an amazing elder board to hold it together. But I think we would do well to learn from the example long set before us: of small, local churches with local leadership, benefiting occasionally from the all-star teacher who was visiting town. Maybe efficiency and effectiveness comes through grassroots insurgency rather than from video sermon distribution.

Having written all that… if you need me, I’ll be off catching up on Matt Chandler’s podcast.

Who decided that efficiency and effectiveness were the highest values for ministry?

There’s an excellent post from Skye Jethani today which hits close to home for me in a number of ways. First off, he’s taking a lesson from the redundancy that is built in to airplanes, making them the safest way to travel. (I’m a certification engineer at an avionics company, so I am very familiar with what he’s talking about.) Second, he asks what the church should be learning on this issue. It is wise to structure a large church organization around a “main man”?

(This also hits home because there was a time in my history when I was told that I would cause great damage to my particular church if I chose to follow what I felt was God’s leading to go elsewhere. I wasn’t the pastor - only an elder and part-time worship leader. I went ahead and left anyway. The church, of course, was fine. But that’s a different story.)

Jethani is asking questions about places like Bethlehem Baptist (John Piper) and Redeemer NYC (Tim Keller), both of which are large organizations built around single, superstar pastors. (Other churches quickly come to mind - Mars Hill Seattle (Mark Driscoll), for instance.)

…whenever I’ve discussed this inherent danger [of a single failure affecting multiple congregations] with those operating video-based multi-site systems they invariably mention the efficiency and effectiveness of their model. Who can disagree? Utilizing one highly gifted person to impact thousands of people in multiple cities is unquestionably efficient….

But who decided that efficiency and effectiveness were the highest values for ministry?

Boom. Awesome question. Jethani goes on to enumerate some reasons why a more redundant, less efficient organization might well be healthier for churches. It’s worth a read.

And oh, yeah - about those airplanes? Some of the most amazing safety engineering ever done happens on those aircraft. They include redundancy in ways you’d never imagine. Very cool stuff.

A Rant about a Church Sign

There is a Baptist church in our town that I drive by on my way to church at least a couple of times a week. For the past couple of weeks they’ve had a message up on their sign that has irritated me to no end. Now, sayings on church signs have a way of being trite and cutesy, but this one has surpassed that and gone on to outright misguided ridiculousness.

First, the quote from the sign:

“Don’t make me come down there!” – God

Here begins the rant.

I’m trying to think of ways this could be interpreted, and no matter how you do it, they’re all bad. Some things it could be construed to be saying:

  • God isn’t actually involved down here on earth right now. Apparently He’s somewhere distant, and just observing. That’s obviously incorrect.
  • People on earth are at some marginally-acceptable level of sinfulness right now. Wrong again! We’re all sinful. No one does good. We’ve all missed the mark.
  • If we cross some line of sinfulness, then… BLAM! God’s gonna come down and make us pay! No. God isn’t up there threatening to blow us away. He promised he wouldn’t flood the earth again and wipe everything out. (I have to remind myself of that when the springtimes get abnormally rainy…) And He poured out His wrath on Jesus. Jesus died so we don’t have to.
  • God coming down here to Earth is a thing to be feared. Uh, no. God coming to Earth in the person of Jesus is the best thing that’s ever happened to Earth and humankind.

I assume somebody at that church saw the message on the internet somewhere, thought it was clever, and put it up without even thinking any further about it. It pains me that the message has been there for weeks now and apparently no one at the church has discernment enough to recognize the gross error and get it taken down.

A message to church sign designers everywhere: if you’re going to put a weekly message on your sign, keep it informational, or, at worst, cutesy. This sign is a big steaming pile of pseudo-cleverness served with a nice heretical gravy on top. Make it go away.

Some thoughts on the proposed new mission statement for Stonebridge

A couple of weeks ago Becky and I attended a Friday night meeting at church where the church leadership discussed their notional new mission statement for the church. While this statement is still a draft, and has yet to be presented to the full congregation, with the pastors’ permission I want to explore the new statement in some detail and explain why I’m very much in favor of it.

First, the statement:

“The mission of Stonebridge Church is to walk alongside each person we meet as they take their next step with Jesus.”

Let’s look at some key phrases.

  • “to walk alongside”. I am more and more convinced that this is the posture that we as Christians should take with all those that we encounter. We are not enemies in opposition of those who don’t believe the way we do; we are not self-righteous, hypocritical mockers of those whose sin is more obvious; we are not insulated saints who retreat to the comfortable hidey-hole where everything is “safe”. Instead, we are right there alongside people, where they are. We have an arm around their shoulders and we are speaking words of love and encouragement. We need to be alongside both the lost and the found, among the rebellious and the repentant alike.
  • “each person we meet”. This phrase reminds us that our calling isn’t limited to the church but is as expansive as each person that God places in our path. The heart of the believer is to be outwardly-focused, and a heart filled with the love of God will overflow into each one they meet.
  • “as they take their next step”. This recognizes that all of us, believers or not, are still in progress, taking one step at a time. It reminds us to be gracious with each person we encounter, because they are on a journey just like we are, even if they’re at a different point. And it reinforces the message of 1 Corinthians 3:5 - 8: that we may each play a different role in God’s work to bring someone to Himself. Whether we plant the seed or water the seed or see the seed blossom into flower, it is God providing the growth, and we are reminded not to be discouraged if our work doesn’t create instant results.
  • “with Jesus.” And this brings us back to the ultimate object of our lives in service to others: to bring them to, and encourage them with, Jesus. Whatever work God calls us to do, it is done out of love for Jesus, in the name of Jesus, and for the glory of Jesus. Whether you are serving on the stage or behind the scenes, publicly proclaiming Christ in the midst of a crowd or quietly sharing with a friend or co-worker, working for justice in a far-off country or just caring for the weak and needy person on your street, you do it for Jesus. God has given diverse roles and functions, but puts us all together in one body, and says that it is the body of Christ (1 Cor 12).

I feel like this mission statement does a good job of capturing the essential direction of ministry that we’re already on at Stonebridge, and I hope that as it is further refined and rolled out it will encourage each of us to be constantly mindful of being alongside those that we encounter every day.

Introverts in the Church

I’ve been doing a slow-and-steady re-read of Adam McHugh’s Introverts in the Church, and words don’t well express how much I resonate with what he is saying. Just as I read Dilbert and think that Scott Adams must’ve worked where I work to get it that right, I read McHugh and think he must’ve served in the same churches I’ve served in. Amazing.

Last night I got to chapter 5, “Introverted Community and Relationships”, and found a few paragraphs that were so apt that I couldn’t resist sharing them.

As introverts seek to enter into and participate in particular communities, their trajectory of commitment may take a different shape than that of their extroverted counterparts. extroverts, who want to increase their level of involvement, may proceed roughly in a straight line as they move from the periphery into the nucleus of the community. … The journey of introverts into a community, however, is better conceptualized as a spiral. They take steps into a community, but then spiral out of it in order to regain energy, to reflect on their experiences and to determine if they are comfortable in that community. They move between entry, retreat and reentry, gradually moving deeper into the community on each loop.

The introverted path into community, much to the confusion of many extroverts, never reaches a point in which the spiraling form is shed.

You know how it feels when someone puts words to something that you’ve always felt and experienced but haven’t been able to describe? That’s how I feel when reading that passage. That’s what my pattern has been, or has needed to be, for the past 10 years.

Some more:

An introverted college student I worked with…encountered several reactions when he chose to step outside of his community after two years of consistent participation. Extroverted leaders chided him for his lack of commitment and were convinced that his pulling back was indicative of a larger spiritual problem infecting his heart. The pastor of the community arranged meetings with him to understand what was happening and what was the source of his dissatisfaction with the group. These efforts, as well intentioned as they were, only pushed him further away instead of drawing him back into his previous level of commitment.

And yes, I’ve been there. And I’m thankful to be in a place now where that isn’t happening.

The hazards of church music...

…aren’t necessarily what you think. My left ankle and leg has been very sore for the last two days. Why? Because I had an hour of music practice on Saturday, followed by an hour of practice and then two church services on Sunday morning. And because I play the keyboard while standing up, and I pedal with the right foot, which means I end up doing a lot of standing and flexing on my left leg.

Do they have special workouts so I can prepare better for this type of strain? This is not the way I thought a commitment to playing in the worship band would wear me down.

The Perils of Hipster Christianity

Brett McCracken’s column that appeared on the Wall Street Journal website yesterday really hit home for me. McCracken, 27, outlines the increasing efforts that the evangelical church has made to try to attract and keep 20-somethings. Whether it’s the obsession with being culturally savvy, or with being technologically cutting-edge, or with using shock tactics (‘you’ve never heard your pastor talk about *this* before’), McCracken argues that they are simply gimmicks that may bring people in the door; “But”, he asks “what sort of Christianity are they being converted to?”

Quoting David Wells, he further adds:

And the further irony is that the younger generations who are less impressed by whiz-bang technology, who often see through what is slick and glitzy, and who have been on the receiving end of enough marketing to nauseate them, are as likely to walk away from these oh-so-relevant churches as to walk into them.

McCracken concludes that “cool Christianity” is not a “sustainable path forward”, and that, “when it comes to church, [twentysomethings] don’t want cool as much as we want real”.

It’s worth reading the whole post. I, for one, give him a hearty Amen.